Small steps, new habits and rogue pants..

So. Yeah. I am on my way. I’m having a hard time with work and life in general. I am stressed to the point where running naked down the street with a pair of scissors singing Battle Hymn of the Republic seem like a logical and completely normal thing one to do on a Tuesday afternoon. Last week I decided just to jump in and start on my fancy new way of eating. Well not really. I am just starting with small steps. I believe if I go full tilt boogie I will stress myself out if I make a mistake and ultimately fail. I think that’s where diets fail. Every. Single. Time. 

I know that the general public view fat people as lazy, slovenly and not able to have enough willpower to lose the weight. However, nothing can be further from the truth. There is no one more determined than someone that is going on a diet. There’s figuring out what diet to do, buying all the special food and then the exercise plan. Buying the DVDs or joining the gym, looking for sports bra that doesn’t cut off circulation to your liver, finding exercise clothes that doesn’t show your underwear. It’s endless. I’ve seen women at the supermarket with the whole cart full of Lean Cuisine, lettuce, skim milk and desperation. I can spot ‘em at 20 paces because I’ve been there. Starting a diet is not only about eating less and exercising; it is about dreams, hope and wishes of a better you. Most importantly, a better future. BUT. I know in my case I throw so much hope into a diet that when I slip and eat a cookie or candy, that ivory tower that I built comes crumbling down…and then I eat the whole box of cookies. Then the whole bag of candy. No one is as hard on themselves as a fat person. I’m sorry but what do people think? That fat people like to be fat?

Anyway. What is the point of that diatribe? Small steps. I figure smaller changes are easier to attain and it makes me feel good that I can stick to those changes even though they are small. Back in December I started going to the gym sporadically. I didn’t start a diet I just ate what I normally ate. Then I started using Splenda in my coffee. I have started to avoid prepackaged food and the margarine I heap on everything. Still eat it but I went from 2 tablespoons to 1 tablespoon. I am moving towards butter which isn’t the best but it’s better than margarine. I think my biggest problem is sugar so last week I have stopped drinking full sugar soda and my beloved Snapple. I am not in “diet” mode, I am in making better choices and listening to my body. 

Along with going to the gym, I have starting jogging. Well sort of a walk and then jog, untangle the dogs, pull up my pants, jog, almost hit a tree and try to figure out what the hell I’m doing type thing. I’ve actually bought undershirt suspenders to keep my damn pants up. I am not ashamed. I can’t wait to try them out.